**I'm you dear**

Her hands were still wet with the dripping blood and her top stained all over with dirt, blood and what not and her mind still trying to grasp a breath in the tsunami of incidents. Since the last time she had her senses she remembered that something rammed her head hard and her world went blur and senses numb. All that she could sense was that she was tied with a chair, hugged with darkness and dead silence wrapped her out of nowhere.
“Please leave me! Where am I?”  She screamed weathering down her vocal chords.
And the silence took over again, tears rolled down her face hurting her like hell; it was a reminder for her that she was badly wounded.  Father’s princess, mammas sweet girl and a college topper  was enough to define her life till then. But where she stands right now? Tied up lifeless with a chair in the middle of nowhere with bleeding wounds and a ruptured body what was she now?
“Please leave me!” She screamed again with everything that was left in her.
Suddenly she could feel a hand caressing all over her lips and chill ran down her spine and her hands and legs went cold when she felt  the warm breath of a beings existence fell on her shoulders.
“You are safe with me!”  a deep voice said with utmost sophistication.
“Who are you? And why are doing this to me” this time she cried, her voice broke and feelings collapsed immensely.
“I’m nothing and I’m everything you want me to be, I’m no one and also everyone at the same time. No matter where you run, you can never escape me.”
This time the voice deepens with a touch of rage. Words didn’t flew alone she could sense his hands running all over her abdomen and slightly lifting up her top. She started screaming and hopping like a fish thrown out of water but those ropes hold her tighter than her father’s care. Silence in that very place thickened to the intensity where she could hear her heart pounding hard.
“Why are you doing this to me? What have I done? ” she enquired in a broken voice
“You want to know who I am. Listen carefully. I’m neither living nor non-living; I’m neither he nor she. I can be everything that you can imagine of me. I’m a friend, a traitor. I’m your murderer also your savior. I can kill you and leave you too. I’m the shadow which follows you every now and then; you can never get rid of me. I’m nowhere and everywhere my dear. All these wounds that you are carrying these are a gift for you from my side you don’t have an option else to remember me till life escapes you.  I can be your most desired dream and worst nightmare at the same time. I know each and every shade of yours. I’m here to love you and destroy in a million little ways.”
As the stream of words ran dry his lips took over  she could feel them over hers, she could feel each and every breath of his and her hands felt free now she felt loose and helpless at the same time as the ropes were replaced by one of his hand now. Slowly his other hand moved towards her back but it paused unexpectedly for a moment she became too numb to understand what to do. As the hands came again this time they lifted her and threw her at a distance over a wet floor she was hurt like hell she tried crawling but in vain none of her legs moved nor her vocal chords vibrated, lying with half consciousness she felt something was being poured over her. It was kerosene; she couldn’t move an inch she knew death is what follows by. But pain, aggression, fear made death a valley of roses for her.
“It’s time to let you free “Came the voice out of nowhere.
With a spark the matchstick burnt and in the faint light she saw who he was. It was her, herself standing right in front of her with all her flaws and carrying all her wounds. It was her. She couldn’t understand a bit of what was happening there, pain curtained her senses widely. Her vision blurred the last thing that she saw was her death coming towards her and the last thing she heard?
“I’m you dear, I’m your loneliness”
With a scream she woke up and found herself lying on her own bed. Sometimes words cut deeper than memories. And the words, they never die they follow us till our last breath.
~Monosij Bhowmik